Healing After One’s Loss of Virginity

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Full Question

How does a woman heal in God’s mercy after losing her virginity?


The best place to start, if you haven’t gone already, is to receive our Lord’s merciful love in the sacrament of reconciliation (Catechism of the Catholic Church 1422ff.). Frequent reception of the Eucharist is also highly recommended in healing and receiving graces to live a chaste life. Regular recourse to the sacrament of reconciliation too—i.e., once a month—is important, even if you only have venial sins to confess.

Know that our Lord loves you, and ask the help of his Blessed Mother and St. Joseph, who are great examples and intercessors regarding chastity. Being forgiven is the first step in healing, though the pain and the guilt may take a while to subside. Nevertheless, rejoice in knowing that you have been forgiven, and persevere, seeking out good friends and resources in helping you live a renewed chaste life. Take comfort also in knowing that many other women—and men—have gone before you in healing after sins against chastity, including St. Mary Magdalene, from whom seven demons were expelled (see Luke 8:1-2).

A more contemporary example is Catholic Answers alumna Crystalina Evert, who has spoken widely on the topic of chastity. She is the inspiring author of the booklet Pure Womanhood. She and her husband Jason–he too a Catholic Answers alumnus–have also written the book How to Find Your Soulmate Without Losing Your Soul.

Catholic Answers’ website Chastity.com also offers a lot of helpful information.

By Tom Nash


1 comment

  1. Patrick Gannon Reply

    Presumably the loss of virginity referred to here is outside the bounds of matrimony, otherwise what healing would be required?
    “…..though the pain and the guilt may take a while to subside.” This is the most important part of the article. The Church is adamant that you should feel pain and guilt – otherwise they would have no control over your mind. You have no need for pain and guilt. You are a human being do what humans evolved to do. Just make sure you use protection!

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