Let’s make it simple. Non-Catholics need to become Catholics, period. This is urgent, so why not speak urgently? If it takes being tough, I say be tough.
For some folks, “being tough” translates as “being rude.” Go ahead and be rude if you like, but you won’t find yourself winning converts. If rudeness is what Catholicism produces as its best fruit, why should anyone sign up? We shouldn’t be mamby-pamby, of course, but we should be kind and firm at once. We mustn’t compromise beliefs, but we shouldn’t use the rack either.