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21 Steps To Guarantee A Great Marriage

  1. Don’t Have Premarital Sex The statistics prove it – there is a much higher chance of a successful marriage if you don’t ever have premarital sex.
  2. Don’t Cohabitate – Cohabitation doubles your chance of divorcing your spouse!
  3. Remain Faithful to Your Spouse – Nothing rings the death knell of marriage like cheating on your spouse.
  4. Stay Away From P*** – It is the fastest growing reasons couples divorce today and there is nothing good about it.
  5. Stay Sober and Never Use Drugs – Moderation helps you make better decisions.
  6. Marry For the Right Reasons – You should marry someone because you believe God is calling you to do so, because you love them, and they are drawing you closer to God. Marrying someone merely because you have strong emotions about them (which will eventually go away), because they are good looking (which won’t last) isn’t the best idea, or because you are a good match. Not every good boyfriend/girlfriend makes a good spouse.
  7. Continue to Work on Communication – Communication is a learned skill and one that we are never perfect at. Learn how your spouse wants to communicate with you and work on it together.
  8. Set Boundaries on Work – There is nothing wrong with being rich and successful. But, if achieving these things costs your family, it isn’t worth it.
  9. Learn to be Selfless – Our job is to live for the other people in our house, not just ourselves. Love is about the other. If you start asking, “what do I get out of it”, then you are setting your relationship up for disaster.
  10. Share a Family Plan on Money – Money is the number one reason couples argue. It can create additional stress if there is no shared plan or expectation. Talking about money regularly is a must.
  11. Tithe! – The money is not your own and God lets you keep most of it! For
  12. Use Natural Family Planning – kids are a gift from God. Couples that use NFP  stay married more than 95% of the time. Yes, it is difficult, but it is worth it. Self control always is.
  13. Talk Positively About Your Spouse – If you always talk positively about your spouse around others, it will spill into how you talk to them as well.
  14. Always Discuss Big Purchases Before Making Them – The next time you want the new model iPhone that costs $600, you should talk about priorities with your spouse first.
  15. Spend More Time With your Spouse than your Friends – Your spouse is your “better-half”, so you should learn to enjoy their company more than your friends. Of course you should still spend time with friends, but the proper balance is key.
  16. Let Love Mature – let your love grow and mature into something more than just mere romance or emotions. While neither are bad, they aren’t true love, which involves always choosing what is good for the other person, no matter the cost.
  17. Go to Church Every Sunday Together and Pray Together Daily – Marriage needs God at the center to truly have the fruit it is intended to.
  18. After Kids – Don’t Forget Your Spouse! – Your kids are important and demand a lot of time, but don’t neglect your marriage because of them. Give it the attention it deserves!
  19. Marry a Christian – There are certainly marriages that succeed between believers and non-believers, but the least you are doing is putting a strain on a relationship if you marry a non-Christian
  20. Be Open To Growth and Change – Say you are sorry, humble yourself,  make changes when you ought to, and be open to what God wants to do in your life..
  21. Spend Time With Other Couples Who Share Your Faith & Values. If this means you have to be the ones to start a married couples group, then make the effort to do so. Your own marriage and others will benefit from shared time, prayer, and conversation.

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Written by Raphael Benedict

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